Sounds like some age-old wisdom, doesn't it? I'm not embarrassed to say that's mine. I came up with that when I was about 20 years old. There is very little I thought or said at that age that is actually worth retaining, but this one is a keeper. It has continued to prove to be true.
Let's break it down. The original saying goes: The way to a man's heart is through his stomach. Of course that was a ringing endorsement for the type of woman our mothers and grandmothers were encouraged to be. It was vital to succeed in your Home Ec. classes so you could be recommended as a great cook. Even in this day and age I have had more than one person say about me, "I can't believe you are still single when you are such a good cook!"
REALLY??!! That's a preposterous notion. My feminist side is grossly offended by the suggestion that my culinary skills should have helped me land a man because that's what makes a good wife. Although, my inner chef is flattered by the idea that I'm that good. Of course, it's ironic. We all know men still secretly want women to be "a maid in the living room, a cook in the kitchen, and a whore in the bedroom." Yet, somehow the ability to navigate your way around a four-burner stove does not seem to hold the same currency it once did.
So, my thinking is it's not just their stomachs, it's their hunger to which you must appeal. But, here's the tricky part: There is no way of defining, identifying, or explaining what distinguishes a man's hunger from his cravings. But, they are often quite different. This is the choice between what they want and what they need. And, frequently what will be most fulfilling loses to what will be instantly pleasing. Though you may have the bigger portion of his heart, there may still be another woman, man, object to get his affection or his passion.
But, it isn't enough just to tell him what you think he wants to hear. You really have to give him what he is lacking. If they are looking to be mothered, you have to put on the apron. If they are in need of discipline, you must don the stilettos and whip. If they want to find their best friend, you'll be sporting a team jersey. Identifying that need and fulfilling it is essential. .
But, is there a way to make the sustenance have the appeal of the dessert? Can you elevate brussels sprouts to the level of chocolate cake? (Incidentally, I have converted many people to brussels sprout fans. Literally. I'm not hinting at some metaphorical prowess in this instance.)
Well, all I can really say is that is the challenge before you and that, my friends, is what separates the chefs from the cooks, the women from the girls.
With that, I'll leave you with this song by Nicolai Dunger:
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