This one's for you! (You know who you are!)

I posted on my status this morning that I'd recently learned Facebook has a feature that, in essence, allows you to cyber-stalk your friends. Aside from the uber-creepyness of that whole concept, I find it more than a little disturbing that we are so lazy now that even psycho-obsessive behavior doesn't require getting out from behind the laptop. But, I digress . . . .

The point of this blog (because I promised someone I would do one today) is about obsessing. I think the title of this blog will be a big clue to you about what tendency you have toward obsessing. If you spend more than a nano-second wondering if you are the person to whom I am referring, you might be an obsessor. See what I did there? Have fun with that today!!!

Seriously, in terms of relationships, I think this tendency is one of the worst for driving a wedge between you and those you love. And, we are all prone to doing it. We become absorbed with the tiniest of most insignificant things that were said or not said, done or not done. Girls, it is a time-tested tradition that men believe we are elephant-like in our memory of every little detail. The stereotype persists that we cling to every miniscule misstep or omission like a hoarder, stockpiling them for a future date when we just might need to use that minor infraction against them.

Now, obviously there are some issues that escape the attention of men which should not be overlooked. They are, afterall (so stereotypically) non-observant oafs who wouldn't notice the elephant in the room if she sat on his lap. However, more times than not, if you have to tell him what he "did wrong," it probably isn't worth mentioning. Sometimes it comes down to a matter of perspective and who is being hyper-sensitive. (No, that's not just directed at the female readers. Boys can be overly sensitive too.)

It all boils down to picking your battles. As a parent we quickly learn the importance of this lesson or risk losing our sanity. Sometimes saying "no" because that is your routine answer isn't the best approach. Sometimes making a federal case out of something perpetuates discord that is totally unnecessary. With your children and your significant others . . . trying not to be gender biased here . . . it is often more effective to let some things slide as long as no one was physically harmed, no laws or moral codes were broken, and it's really no skin off your nose to let it go. Especially when harping on it isn't going to get the desired result anyway.

Why not start practicing now. This will be your mantra . . . Let it go! Let it go! Let it go! . . . It's amazing what releasing some of that baggage will do for your relationship. If you make a habit of ignoring one meaningless bit of minutae every day, you'll find you feel less like an elephant -- lighter and less encumbered by burdens you don't need to carry with you.

So, here's to letting it go on occasion. Here's to allowing your obsessions to fade into obsolescence just like the sickeningly-sweet cologne by Calvin Klein.